The Sex-Starved Wife: What to Do When He's Lost Desire
Michele Weiner Davis has been working with troubled couples for over 20 years. She's gathered her wisdom in book "The Sex-Starved Wife: What to Do When He's Lost Desire". --- It's very usual for people to be uneven in sexual desire. That is not a deal-breaker and is not inevitably a problem. How couples deal with that becomes the issue. The major reasons for lower-drive spouses fit into 3 categories: biological, emotional or relationship-oriented. Emotional problem: Women really do not realize the impact losing a job has on men's self-esteem - the last thing they would be interested in is making love.
Dont's for him and Don'ts for her - Instant Turn-offs and turn-ons
Don't ask her how much her sexy new lingerie cost: She has made the effort, so don`t put a price on pleasure. Don't ask if you can call her Angelina: Role play is ok, until it involves someone prettier than your partner. No woman wants to think the only way you can enjoy sex is if you convince yourself that you`re having it with someone who is slimmer or younger. --- Don'ts for her: Don't ask if the heating is off: household issues are a turn-off. Do's for her: Do the things your mother told you not to: Jerry Hall said the secret to keeping a man was "to be a maid in the living room, cook in the kitchen and wh*re in the bedroom".
Research offers explanations and advice for better sex - Excerpt
In their book "He's Just Not Up for It Anymore" Bob Berkowitz and Susan Yaeger-Berkowitz offer explanations and tips for getting your sex life back. From surveys and interviews with 4,000 men and women in this situation, they named various psychological, physical and emotional causes. Their book provides helpful insight and examples for solving your personal problems. Drs. Max and Della Fitzgerald say the main problem is often boredom: "Same place, same station. We do it the same way every time." Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results is wonderful definition of insanity.
The Sex-Starved Wife: Tips on how to get him in the mood more often
Is your husband losing interest in sex and you can't work out what to do about it? Michele Weiner Davis, author of "The Sex-Starved Wife," reveals some insights. -- Because masculinity and virility are strongly connected, it strikes panic in the hearts of men to even think that they don't desire sex. The partner with lower desire can't understand why spouse seems so obsessed with sexual relationship. The highly sexed spouses should gently but firmly push spouses with a lower sex drive to take a more active role in reducing the desire gap - Learning ways to help husbands cope with problems as depression, poor body image and stress, which may be suppressing his desire.
Interviewing men to discover their desires, fears and turn ons
Nima Badley says that most books on sexual advice seem to be written by women for women. "But in these books there`s one voice that`s missing - a man`s! That`s why, with my wife Cynthia, I spent a year interviewing men to discover their desires, fears and turn ons. ... But what surprised me was how willing men were to articulate their desires." Too shy to ask your man what turns him on? Here`s what research revealed...
Desire discrepancy: you're out of sync sexually with your partner
How many nights have you spent on the bed awake with passion, while your partner is curled up next to you deep in sleep? Or maybe you're the one who's OK with having sex every week or so, while he's looking for it every other day. You used to do it all the time. What happened? Has the thrill packed up and gone? Not necessarily. The problem is that you've got desire discrepancy -- you're out of sync sexually with your partner. The upshot is that desire discrepancy is part of a long-term relationship. If it is not acknowledged, it can lead to feelings of rejection, guilt, and frustration all around.
Official: Men really do have sex on the brain - Misread flirting
According to a study men 'oversexualise' conversations and wrongly assume women are interested in a sexual relationship, misreading friendliness for flirting on the part of a woman. As a result many men come away from first meetings incorrectly believing there had been sexual chemistry between them. The findings may help explain why men complain about women sending mixed signals. "Men were more likely to perceive their partner as sexy and flirtatious. But that didn't at all correspond with how she saw him or she saw herself. Behaviour that looks like she is engaged in the conversation may actually be taken as signs of sexual interest, as opposed to what she intends, which is friendliness."
How The Foods You Eat Can Affect Your Performance In Bed
The length of your performance, the quality of your sexual technique and even the strength and reliability of your erections are all, to some degree or another, controlled by the foods you eat on a daily basis. The blueberry is a sexual super-food often referred to as 'nature's little blue pill' because of its remarkable similarities to the wonder drug 'Viagra'. However, unlike 'Viagra', blueberries are cheap, readily available and able to be consumed in bulk!
True or False - Men think about sex every seven seconds
Males are driven to reproduce, evolutionarily speaking, but there is no scientific way of measuring to what extent that desire consumes their everyday lives. Thankfully, for world productivity as a whole, seven seconds seems a gross overstatement, as best researchers can tell.
More sex boosts men's fertility
Abstinence does not make sperm grow stronger, an expert said. In fact waiting too long without having sex can make a man's sperm less active and fertile. Something happens when the sperm stops in the male tract. It is damaged for some reason, and does worse in terms of fertility. The numbers might not be less but the quality is less. If a man is regularly having sex, at least 10% of his sperm cells will have the normal structure that allows them to latch on to and penetrate the egg. But after four days of abstinence, this proportion fell to about 8%.
How Do The Sexes Differ When It Comes To Sex
"Men may talk too much about what they want and women not enough", Printz said that it's no big secret guys tend to focus on the physical aspects, whereas women are all about the relationship. Both men and women say they're not well matched -- with most men wanting sex more often than their wives. And when it comes to how often couples are having sex, the average is between one to four times a month, according to the survey.
It may take three days for a man's sex glands to recover
The time it takes after orgasm for bodies to return to normal levels of functioning is known as the refractory period. As men age, the refractory period generally gets longer. It can vary from a few minutes to a day or more. There is no invariable rule, as the refractory period normally varies with any one man and varies from man to man.