First marriage - Is there a perfect age?
The age of first marriage has been rising steadily. The median age is now nearly 26 for women and nearly 28 for men. And as young people wait longer to marry, there is debate over whether waiting is a good idea. Those who urge marriage in the early to mid-20s say that's the age when the pool of possible mates is larger, it's when couples can "grow up" together and it's prime for childbearing. But others favor the late 20s or early 30s, saying maturity makes for happier marriages and greater economic security — both of which make divorce less likely. It's well documented that those who marry before age 20 are 2-3 times more likely to divorce.
How to save a marriage - The Proper Care
Many marriages are filled with resentments, complaints and bitterness. In her latest book, "The Proper Care and Feeding of Marriage," Laura Schlessinger offers advice on how to bring a marriage back from the brink of disaster. The first issue is to understand the fundamentals of the two people involved; one is a woman, the other is a man. So much sociopolitical time has been spent trying to eliminate the reality and meaning of masculine and feminine, that men and women are afraid and hostile to acknowledge their own pleasure in being such and in yearning for the complementary gender in their spouse.
What makes marriages work - 6 Stages of Marriage researched
More than half of us are not only bad at marriage, we're lousy at divorce - and we don't seem to be learning a thing: 60% of second marriages fail as well. So if we don't learn from our failures, is it possible to learn from others' successes? Researchers began a long-term look at marriage to discover what makes the good ones work. Stages of marriage are set by emotional themes and interaction patterns. (1) Partners see each other as perfect: necessary for a trust in each other's commitment. (2) Yet as signs of external interests emerge the other partner may view it as betrayal. The task is to start accepting differentness as enhancing the relationship.
Longevity - Married people live longer
Professors have analyzed data on 67,000 Americans and found that people who never married tended to die earlier than those who were divorced, separated or widowed. The researchers determined that divorced or separated people were 27% more likely to have died during that time period than married people living together. Widows and widowers were 39% more likely, and those who never married were 58% more likely. While it's hard to establish a causal relationship between marriage and longevity, researchers theorize that social bonds make a difference: "Being connected and being loved and perhaps being less stressed have beneficial effects for survival."
Marriage - Comments by younger generation
As teenagers talk about of marriage, their comments reveal a dreary view of the institution. "I'm not looking forward to marriage," says Nakeeda Burns, "and I don't think we [people in general] should be married, because I see how other marriages ended up in my family. It's always a disaster." Even the married couples these teens know don't seem happy. "All of my friends who are married, they tell me not to get married," says Anderson Felix. Anita Marshall blurts out, "I want a big wedding if I get married," but she doesn't think she'll make it to the altar. Her mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother were married; now they're all divorced.
How To Keep Your Relationship or Marriage Alive
If you have been married for a while, it`s easy to get lost in your busy lifestyles. Keeping you relationship alive, takes a lot of work, you have to have to be spontaneous and keep things interesting. At first you can`t get enough of each other, but after a few years, things slow down, and sometime even comes to a halt. Some simple ways to keep your relationship alive, will be taking afternoon walks together or upon wakening-up everyday, say something nice to each other before starting your day. If your relationship is based on convenience, love really doesn`t stand a change to make a come back.
The biggest mistake couples make: Taking monogamy for granted
As part of a proactive approach, psychologist Barry McCarthy suggests couples discuss the importance of fidelity from the outset, identifying the type of situation that would put each at greatest risk. Is drinking on a business trip your downfall, or the novelty of an exotic individual from a far-off locale? As for Internet relationships the safest way to protect the primary relationship is to "make sure that no online interactions are secret. This means having your partner agree that neither of you will say anything to someone online that you aren't willing for the other one to read. If they resist and invoke privacy rights, it is probably because they already have something to hide."
Talking after marriage
When my husband and I were dating, we could talk for hours about anything and everything. Now that we`re married, we go out to dinner and have nothing to say to each other. -- Research makes it clear that little girls are blessed with greater linguistic ability, and it remains a lifelong talent. Simply stated, she talks more than he. A wife wants to know what her husband is thinking, The husband finds some things better left unsaid - It is a classic struggle. You can overcome the problem if you will get it out in the open and agree to work together on communication.
The 10 Secrets of a Happy Relationship
The statistics on relationships are depressing: in California alone, the average marriage lasts just 5 years. Nationwide, 43% of marriages end within 15 years. Second and third marriages end in divorce 60-70% of the time. Clearly, how we handle our relationships is not working. (1) It starts with you. (2) There's you, there's him/her, and then there's "we". (6) Don't compare. (7) Don't wonder "what if?".
Tips For A Happy Marriage
In January 2006, I will be married to my husband for 29 years. Great marriages don`t just happen. You have to do something to make it last. Improve your marriage now. Remember that improvement is not a one-time event. It`s a process, so better start now. The Qualities of a Successful Marriage: Love, Support, Tolerance, Communication, Realistic Expectations, Caring, Nurturing, Sense of Humor, Commitment, Respect...
Essential Manners for Couples
Recently, I was talking to a woman much younger than I who was in a committed relationship. I couldn`t help noticing, she was rather agitated and that the focus of her agitation was her gentleman friend, who was talking to very attractive younger woman. When I innocently asked if there was a problem, with daggers in her eyes she replied, `It`s been more than five minutes, and he`s still talking to her!` The moral of the story is this: What appears to be innocent behavior to one person in a relationship can be seen as egregious behavior by the other partner. Each couple has to make their own boundaries, and each partner needs to respect those boundaries.
Will Women Halt the Death of Marriage?
It`s not that men are against marriage, per se; it`s that men are against the cauldron of marriage in our American gynocracy. Marriage for men in this country has become a sucker`s deal—financially, legally, and emotionally. Given the 50% rate of divorce and its concomitant ebb of wealth, the prospect of marriage to a man is akin to investing 50% of his wealth in a new stock that has a guaranteed 50% probability of tanking—not to mention the deleterious effects on the relationship he has with his children.