Why We Lie - Because our self-esteem is threatened
We all lie, all the time. It causes problems, to say the least. So why do we do it? "It's tied in with self-esteem," says psychologist Robert Feldman. "We find that as soon as people feel that their self-esteem is threatened, they immediately begin to lie at higher levels." Not all lies are harmful. In fact, sometimes lying is the best approach for protecting privacy and ourselves and others from malice. Some deception, such as boasting and lies in the name of tact and politeness, can be classified as less than serious. But bald-faced lies, are harmful, as they corrode trust and intimacy—the glue of society.
"I always practice safe sex." "I've never been promiscuous." "I just had an AIDS test six weeks ago." "Don't worry, I'm on the pill." Your sex partner may be telling you these health-threatening lies just to get you between the sheets. Findings suggest that risk-relevant lies tended to be self-protective, while risk-irrelevant lies tended to be other-protective.
Love, Lies, Betrayal, and Deceit- Why Do We Lie to Those We Love?
Our romantic relationships are seldom what they seem. We all want a relationship that is built on openness, intimacy, and trust, but the truth is, our relationships do not always work that way. More often than not, our intimate relationships involve secrecy and deceit. In fact, if you want to look for deception and betrayal in your own life, the best place to start is close to home. Husbands and wives, boyfriends and girlfriends, often lie about their true feelings, and their level of commitment. Basically our romantic relationships are full of paradoxes which we try to overlook, downplay and ignore. For the most part, this works well. Until the day comes when it doesn't...